MEET the 36-year-old virgin who has never been kissed because she prefers cake dinners instead of socializing.
Anya Panchal, 36, has spent most of her adulthood alone and considers herself ”abandoned” because although she wanted to meet a partner, she never went on a date and chose to eat pudding at home instead. to the bar. .
She suffers from social anxiety and admits she only started making friends at age 22.
As well as this, childhood bullying left Anya, who lives in Ilford, Essex, too shy to talk to men and she found attending gatherings “terrifying”.
According to a poll by the National Survey of Sexual Attitudes and Lifestyles, while half of Britons had sex when they were 17 and the majority were 18, Anya is now trying to overcome her worries. socialize so you can have your first kiss. , form a romantic relationship and lose her virginity.
She said: “I’ve never been confident enough to talk to a man, let alone go on a date – I don’t know what to say.
“All my friends are married and have parents, which makes me feel like I’m living in their shadow.
“I have never had a romantic kiss like in the movies.
”It’s strange that I’m still a virgin at this age.
“My parents have been married for 40 years – they just want to see me happy but with the right person.
“I want to have a connection with someone beyond the physical aspect but to get there you have to go on a date and the thought of talking to a man makes me nervous.
“I’m afraid I’ll get to a certain age and regret not trying to find anyone but I’d rather spend a Saturday night at home than go out drinking.”
Anya, who used to work helping children get to school but is now unemployed, said her troubles began at the age of 16 when she battled social anxiety throughout her school years.
She began isolating herself at home – where she still lives with her parents – and admitted to missing out on her ”core teenage years”.
When Anya was 22, she was determined to change her social life and started making friends through a Facebook group for “lonely people.”
Although she was nervous at first, she started connecting with people online as well as with old classmates and soon she had people she could interact with.
“When I finally made friends, it was great, I was able to start going out, getting my nails done with them and going to the movies,” she said.
“We go to the local pub for a drink or sometimes a meal, it’s great but also scary to put ourselves back in social situations.
“During my twenties, my small group of friends and I used to go out for the odd night out at a local club, it was scary- I was very attractive but I couldn’t seem to talk to the guys male.
“I would never have the courage to get on the dance floor- I would just sway on the sidelines with my rum and coke.
“The men who approached me were all quite handsome but I didn’t have the confidence to talk, let alone kiss or even be intimate with them.”
With her newfound social life, she even embarked on some online dating, however, she was met with a less than romantic response.
Despite trying out dating apps with an “open heart”, she quickly noticed men only seemed to be looking for sex – and stopped using them.
As Anya grew up, her friends moved on with their lives, starting to date and form serious long-term relationships – making her feel like she was ”on the shelf”.
But there are a few cases where men catch Anya’s eye.
She continued: “When I was 20, my friends and I went to a club in Romford and there were lots of attractive men.
“They were looking towards me and my friends but I was shy to talk to them.
“Similarly, when I was 26 years old, I was walking down the street and saw a tall man with lovely cheekbones.
“I think he could tell that I was looking at him because he looked me up and down and then walked away.
“Since then I have not loved anyone anymore.”
I feel like I want to meet someone because I don’t want to be 70 with a lot of regrets.
Now that most of her friends are married or coupled up – her lack of intimacy is getting harder to get used to.
“When they started having kids and getting married, it all started sinking in that I couldn’t go on with my life anymore,” she said.
“I know most women my age have multiple partners, I don’t feel jealous but more that it’s wrong because being intimate with someone is important.
“It makes me feel like my adult life hasn’t even begun – despite being almost 36 years old.”
Even though she describes herself as a “hopeless romantic”, Anya still feels scared when it comes to talking to or going on a date with a man.
She said: ”I knew I needed to change my lifestyle or I would never experience life to the fullest.
“I feel like I want to meet someone because I don’t want to be 70 with a ton of regrets.
“I’ve been a recluse for six years and only since 2010 have I had friends, but of course they’ve all gotten married and started their own families.
“Don’t get me wrong, they’re great friends but I really feel like there’s a part of me that’s missing without my partner.
“To get a mate, you have to date and the thought of that scares me.
“Because I’m not in the dating pool, I don’t even know what to do.
“The thought of being intimate with a man makes my stomach turn because I don’t even know how to start.
“I think it’s wrong for women my age to have multiple partners because you should only have one special partner in your life.
“For me, sex should be between two people who love each other, not a one-night stand or anything.
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“I had absolutely no experience with men but I knew I wanted someone with a good personality, who liked long walks in the park and had a little money.
“Above all, I want to have an emotional connection with someone because that’s the most important thing — or so I’ve been told.”